Coffee Bible Church
Posted on November 25th, 2005 by Reformed Pope into the Pastor Hank, City Boobie Church categoryI copied this from CBC’s bulletin last week. It was written by Pastor Frank and I have done nothing to change it.
TODAY’S THOUGHT
Starbucks has become one of the world’s best retailers of the
$3 cup of coffee. Many of us make our morning pilgrimage to
this Temple of Java. Having spent our $3 to be awakened by the
aroma of the caffeinated black stuff, we’re not appalled that
we just spent that much for a cup of hot liquid - we’re actually
grateful that it’s a part of our life.
The Starbucks culture has become a significant part of the
relational infrastructure of our society. Meeting friends,
hanging out, spending time with people oftentimes involves,
“let’s grab a cup of coffee.”
The fact that coffee and relationships have joined forces in
modern day America is perhaps not so coincidental. Starbucks
has positioned itself as a Creator of Community.
When we look at Acts 2 we recognize that God intended that
His spiritual family would be the Creator of authentic and true
Community. God’s interested not just in what we get done – but
in how we build up the people around us. Perhaps that’s why
Jesus reported to the Pharisees that the second commandment
was as important as the first – love your neighbor.
Take some time this week to read Mark 2:1-12 and explore how
four friends intentionally built community.
This “Thought” pretty well sums up all of Pastor Hank’s sermons. He spends the first 2/3rds rambling about his own personal thoughts, the last 1/3rd telling you what he thinks the Bible says, and the final 1/8th (he always goes over) giving you a scripture to look up on your own.
Now, if your church was call City Damazio Church or Frank Temple, then it would be appropriate to follow such a pattern. However, when you call yourself City Bible Church, you certainly mislead your members.
City Bible Church you are a fraud and I demand that you now change your name to “City Not-so-much-of-the Bible Church”
…Am I missing something? Does the Bible say to “Honor thy Father and thy Coffee Bean”? Can “Barista” be translated to “Elder”? Was Jesus’ first miracle turning water into a caramel macchiato? Is heaven really a Low Fat, Extra Hot, Hazelnut Latte? Does Frank actually own stock in Starbucks?
Now that I’m thinking about it, in the last 6 months I’ve heard 2 sermons that revolve around Starbucks… and when you read the profiles of the Generation Unleashed leaders they list their favorite coffee drink? Is that being “relevant” or are they a little obsessed?
You know, all this time I’ve thought I was upset with CBC for their teaching (or lack there of), but now I realize what it really is:
I’m a Coffee People kind of guy.
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November 25th, 2005 at 6:36 pm
Once again we see that CBC is about rich white guys that are totally out of touch with people’s needs and resources. The rank and file in this city cannot afford to spend $3 a day to buy a freakin’ cup of coffee. They are eeking out a living; ie, buying diapers for their babies, paying for childcare while they work, putting food on the table. How many single moms do you know who visit Starbucks once a day? So once again CBC sums up to whom they are interested in “ministering”: wealthy urbanites. Way to make the baby Jesus cry, Frank. Me too.
November 25th, 2005 at 6:48 pm
Hi Reformed Pope, I just dropped in on my way back to my Cathedral site. I liked what I
found and thought that I would leave you a note for your efforts in creating Coffee Bible Church.
November 26th, 2005 at 7:53 am
I’m with you, sparrow355 in seeing this bulletin message as a clear indicator of CBC’s “target” group: middle/upper class urbanites. While I may be able to afford Starbucks daily, I’m in touch enough with the Portland metro area to know that most of us cannot, and certainly would never promote Starbucks as a substantive ingredient to relationships or community! Maybe I’m in touch because I spend most of my time IN the city, INTERACTING WITH people who are not like me, people who don’t believe, dress or earn like I do. Of course, that cannot be said for the main or marginal pastors of CBC. They’re in their own little cloister, so they have no clue how the majority of our city lives or what ingredients create “authentic community” for them. CBC will never make headway in reaching unbelievers in Portland unless they change their root approach and GO to the lost instead of expecting the lost to come to them to see their irrelevant plays, etc.
November 26th, 2005 at 9:12 am
Jesus = coffee, great. This is so CBC. How would you like your Jesus? Decaf, lite, soy substitute, double shot. We have a Jesus just the way you want Him, you decide its all about your experience.
Parable of the sower, one seed and four results. The seed is the word, the results are in God’s hands. But now we have a variety of seeds to get the results we want. It is much easier with our programs, we know what to expect.
Please pray for Frank to have an Isa. 6 experience.
November 26th, 2005 at 1:11 pm
Did you just say…Coffee People…?
OH MY GOD.. TRAITOR!!!!!!!!!
November 26th, 2005 at 10:55 pm
Yes…the Coffee People Velvet Hammer and most any other of their drinks are much better than the aforementioned establishments. Plus, you get an extra punch on your coffee card towards a free small mocha if you answer their daily trivia question correctly. Plus, they form an outpost of the greater city community, the real city…but then, there are much better independent coffee houses (Albina Press, Muddy’s, etc. see Willamette Week coffee house ratings published a while back, August or September)…that actually provide a wellspring of community in the neighborhoods they are in…and guess what, they aren’t even national “brands”! Can you imagine? Non-corporate, average businesses that provide a pleasant product to the neighborhoods and cities they are located near? Bring on the poetry recitals!
November 27th, 2005 at 6:11 pm
I do think that Starbucks and other coffee houses have replaced the pub and ice cream shop as a social meeting place, besides you can get REGULAR cup of coffee at a decent price with a great place to talk. Even so I think you all have hit the nail on the head, CBC is about income to maintain the monolith and not about reaching the lost. If you want to maintain the dome culture you must cater to those who can pay for it, and convince them that they are doing a great thing in doing so. Just look at the Lakewood chuch in Texas and its glossy boy “pastor”. It takes alot of money to keep up the pastoral lifestyles and the T1 lines to transmitt realtime video to “Satellite Campuses”. Thats not going to come from the less than once a day Starbuck’s crowd. “Money, money, its a rich man’s world…” Its all going to fall and burn someday. Will it all be worth the compromise? I wonder.
November 28th, 2005 at 5:48 am
So much for the church being a non-profit agency right! Its seems to be the same every where. In my home town church, where I don’t attend any longer, the pastor drives a Saab. I believe he also has some other massive SUV. Of course he doesn’t have a theology degree either. Point being that Massena is a small town of 15,000 or so, where does the money come from?? I wonder what he promotes for coffee? I’ll have to spy some sunday…*cringe*
November 28th, 2005 at 7:25 am
CBC does seem obsessed with Starbucks. It is reflective of their “How to be cool” image.
“Starbucks is trendy, so if we talk about Starbucks, then we’ll be trendy too.”
How much would you love it, if in five years, Frank leaves CBC, and then opens up a bunch of Starbucks all over Portland. You see him behind the counter in that ridiculous green apron, calling for a Double Shot Low-Fat Mocha.
I think I’d like him a lot more that way.
November 28th, 2005 at 8:51 am
“I do think that Starbucks and other coffee houses have replaced the pub and ice cream shop as a social meeting place, besides you can get REGULAR cup of coffee at a decent price with a great place to talk.”
Regarding the above comment…the ice cream shops were from the fifties, and I really doubt Starbucks has culturally replaced the local pub. It’s just that CBC doesn’t believe in drinking, so they have no other choice but to go to Starbucks. And, I have to say, that Starbucks does NOT have an environment that is a “great place to talk.” They have cheap wooden chairs with occasional stiff sofa chairs. They are definitely not a coffee shop that caters to coffee drinkers that wish to stay & chat or study. The environment is uncomfortable enough to get people moving out the door. It’s basically the fast-food version of coffee. Then, you have the Starbucks counters in Albertson’s & Fred Meyer. These are grocery store employees that are making those drinks. They don’t know jack about making good coffee drinks. Later in the day, they can be seen behind the deli case serving hot jo-jo’s & chicken strips. If you’re looking for a comfortable coffee shop that has a great environment for getting together to talk or to study, there are lots of them out there. CBC really shouldn’t be supporting anything corporate. They need to support mom & pop shops. Village Coffee in Mult. Village, Fireside Cafe on 12th & Powell, Coffee Romance on 82nd & Powell…the list goes on…
Karli
November 28th, 2005 at 8:59 am
Oh, and I forgot to say that I think it is inappropriate to try to use Starbucks as an analogy for Acts 2. It makes me nauseated just thinking about it.
November 28th, 2005 at 9:42 am
I think you’ve nailed it Karli. It really is incredibly inappropriate to compare a business with a Biblical Church. Frank just doesn’t seem to get it. He’s obsessed with business and money, and thus he runs his church in a similar manner.
Of course Starbucks sells coffee. What does City Bible sell?
November 28th, 2005 at 9:48 am
“What does City Bible sell?”
1.Happiness
2.Frank’s Books
3.Peace
4.Increased Finances (?)
5.Kevin Conner’s Books
6.Marital Bliss
7.Coffee
8.Anything you can “Believe” for
9.Nothing
November 29th, 2005 at 6:45 am
It sells parking passes