“Simply put, out”…
Posted on June 15th, 2006 by Reformed Pope into the Uncategorized category
I recently received this email from a CBC member who passes his time at church in some creative ways.
We men need our 'dude' time together. It's perfectly OK.
My kids and wife won't leave City Business and I wont force my bride to leave (I guess my wife has made more effort than me to interject issues like faith and relationship with God with her circle-shame on her!-and I have met some men who are incredible guys; albeit we really don't always see the world in the same way) so I pass the time during sermons or forced group hugs oddly and a bit curiously.
For instance, when the message of "Imagine" some new-age, mall quality, stupefying drivel drones forth I catch myself trying to determine which spot in this dome will be the safest in the event of an earthquake, or why do most of the women here look so ridiculously attractive, and just where in the heck are they walking back and forth to for an hour and a half?…am I suffering mid-life issues…Is there a crack dealer in the lobby?
A fave time passer is trying to figure out whether the countries represented by each flag have jihadists battling our Marines. Other times I think it would be truly hilarious to have a Rainbow bumper sticker affixed to each car parked in the lot, or a
Hilary in '08 sticker permanently affixed just to be a fly on the wall at the drive in claims office…"you smashed your bumper because why?
Or sometimes I want to join the video team and interject updated sports scores under FD's sattelited sermons like ESPN, or run a slightly edited version of the tithe message of the week, such as "Good morning, this is your Lord, and I do not completely authorize this message",:) and then take for take, just once, break down this stuff from the Bible's broader meaning of liberal tithing. This would be accompanied by liberal doses of discussion of the emergence of the post-modern church or at least proper batting techniques, micro brews or something else I really care about. I really wish the 90 minutes could be devoted to issues a bit more weighty, but this sad pup has resigned himself to the notion that that is a fantasy at present.
On the Web, under 'Our purpose', the Pastor writes "Simply put, out(sic) purpose and mission is to lead people to become fully devoted followers of Christ." OK then, when do we start?
Oh the ways I amuse myself are countless, but it's really sad that I have to. By the way, thanks to whoever started this site.
No sir, thank you. Thank you for giving every male member of CBC, who can't leave because of their family, something to do next week. By the why readers, where is the safest place in the domes in the event of an earthquake?
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June 15th, 2006 at 10:32 am
Right beside Frank.
June 15th, 2006 at 10:39 am
More than likely the safest place to be in a monolithic dome during an earthquake is near the edges, as the crumbling of the structure would be far worse in places where there is more concrete over your head. In the case of the CBC domes, I would be more worried about the tons of light steel and acoustic paneling suspected from said concrete dome. According to the manufacturer (http://www.monolithic.com/), the superstructure is supposed to perform well in medium-sized tremors. The ceiling and all its associated materials are another matter though.
My bet would be to run for the back rows, near the dome’s tension ring. If that is not an option, I’d dive for the stage. There seems to be way fewer heavy objects suspected directly above the platform (no speakers, flags, catwalks, etc). Towards the back stage wall might even be best, out of the path of falling curtain counterweights and light fixtures. You might get wet though when the baptismal cracks open.
June 15th, 2006 at 12:31 pm
Wherever they count the tithe.
June 15th, 2006 at 12:48 pm
I think they count it in Frank’s Money bin.
“Life is like a hurricane here in Frankburg…”
June 15th, 2006 at 1:32 pm
Thanks AJ, I love the imagery.
I am visiting family this August and definitely have to see the domes. I haven’t attended since they were PBT and housed downtown.
What did they do with the other building?
When I go, I’ll at least know where to sit.
June 15th, 2006 at 3:15 pm
Great letter! And just so you know: the women look ridiculously attractive because they are drowning in debt (to Nordstrom) to try to look the part!
June 15th, 2006 at 3:36 pm
The last time I experienced an earthquake while sitting in the dome I was in the choir room in Covenants class with Lanny Hubbard. Nothing fell on my head. But I am pretty sure that Lanny heard the expletive I let loose. He kinda looked at me funny when everything stopped moving. And yes, Nordstom probably does own the soul of most women at CBC. My sister used to refer to it as the land of the beautiful people. City Church in Kirkland is much the same way. With the pretty people.
June 15th, 2006 at 6:45 pm
In the case of an earthquake at citi business, I think as long as babies aren’t falling on me from the nursery upstairs as I’m dying due to falling debree peircing my sides, it’ll all be o.k.
-_-
June 15th, 2006 at 7:10 pm
Come on people, didn’t you know that God’s people are beautiful people?
rich
skinny
perfectly dressed
June 16th, 2006 at 12:21 pm
lol.. a rainbow bumber sticker on every car
now that’s hilarious.