This website is a parody of City Bible Church. We are not owned or operated by Frank Damazio or affiliated with City Bible Church. Please do not send us your tithe.
It is not by grace that one enters the kingdom of heaven, but by tithing.

- Damazio 3:16


The Case of the Vancouver Property Purchase

Posted on July 17th, 2006 by catalyst into the Uncategorized category

Here's the latest take on City Bible's recent Ice Rink acquisition. This comment comes from new commenter MarcEstesMidLifeCrisis:

It makes good business sense. CBC has no liability in the loan or the building, and the partners can make a profit, something the church can't do. Plus the LLC provides a firewall between the church and other organizations.

The name of the LLC pretty much says it all. If they had actually bought the building expressly for the church, they could have named it CBC Vancouver, or CBC North, or Frank's Love Shack. Instead, they named it something innocuous so other groups will rent or lease from them.

A few years in the future, if property values go up, Bruce can sell the building for $$$ and CBC still keeps its lease. Or if property values stay steady, Bruce can sell the property to the church under market value and claim the remainder as a donation. CBC gets the building at half price, Bruce gets a huge tax deduction.

Just like God intended.

Well, at least it's an intelligent business move. This doesn't bother me as much as the constant preaching of wealth from the pulpit.

9 Comments To This Post

  1. Henri The Amazing said:    

    What Would Jesus Do?

    Jesus would be a great business man.

  2. MarcEstesMidLifeCrisis said:    

    Phase 1 was to acquire the property. Phase 2 will be to brag about it nonstop. Although home prices, as well as sales, have cooled considerably over the past year, commercial property has not. Ask any broker in the Vancouver area for a retail space for sale. There isn’t any available. A great many businesspeople or investors were competing with CBC.

    Bruce and co were definitely not in a bidding war just with other churches. That’s just CBC spin. If you ask Jack why they were chosen over all others it would go something like this: “Well CBC members are all tithers, and you know we are all doing battle against the powers and the principalities. And the more you tithe, the more you win against the powers and the principalities. And those other churches, they don’t tithe as much, so God protects them from powers, but not principalities, or maybe God protects them from principalities, but not powers. Either way the powers and the principalities made it so those other churches didn’t win the sale.”

    I’ve heard Jack speak. He can’t remember more than one verse at a time.

    The reality is that there was an agreement between Bruce and CBC for some sort of “safe harbor” lease agreement which helped attain financing approval. Otherwise, the news articles wouldn’t mention anything about CBC at all. I bought a car. It gets me to church once a week. But I don’t tell my buddies I bought a car for CBC.

    The kickback is this: CBC helps Bruce get the building. Bruce gives CBC a cushy lease. CBC gets 3 additional tithes per week. Bruce gets all referrals for the building (Eternity plays start out with people sliding to Hell going, “Where am I? And why is it so cold and slippery?), CBC gets additional tithing from Bruce, Bruce gets a bigger tax deduction, CBC gives Bruce a chair on stage moving Jack closer to the door. Jack’s decrepit soul dies a little more inside.

    If this were a medical office, this deal would have been illegal under FTC rules. Since it’s a church, the FTC might not care, but the accounting department in Heaven is probably pissed.

  3. Checkmarks said:    

    I just think we should have church services ON the actual ice rink, while everyone skates around.

    But that’s just me.

  4. catalyst said:    

    To be fair, CBC is hardly the only church that does this.

    This is something that’s wrong with the American Religious Community not just CBC. (I’m quite certain the Mormons and Catholics are doing the same thing).

  5. FICM said:    

    I’ll bet it’s Ed Schefter’s dream to have Eternity on Ice!

  6. catalyst said:    

    FICM on July 18, 2006 at 6:05 am said:

    I’ll bet it’s Ed Schefter’s dream to have Eternity on Ice!

    I think we just found our first entry for “Comment of the Year”.

  7. anna said:    

    FICM on July 18, 2006 at 6:05 am said:

    I’ll bet it’s Ed Schefter’s dream to have Eternity on Ice!

    So does that mean it really will be a cold day in hell?

  8. FICM said:    

    anna on July 18, 2006 at 8:54 am said:

    FICM on July 18, 2006 at 6:05 am said:

    I’ll bet it’s Ed Schefter’s dream to have Eternity on Ice!

    So does that mean it really will be a cold day in hell?

    I nominate this post above mine! hahahahaha

  9. ChurchGirl said:    

    anna on July 18, 2006 at 8:54 am said:

    FICM on July 18, 2006 at 6:05 am said:

    I’ll bet it’s Ed Schefter’s dream to have Eternity on Ice!

    So does that mean it really will be a cold day in hell?

    PRICELESS…

Leave A New Comment

Enter the validation code from the image