So its snowing here in Portland (yes, Portland Snow…which isn't much, but will eventually turn to ice and then we will all be stuck in). And it's Sunday morning so I went to my churches website to see if they have canceled today's service or not…of course since my church is rather small they haven't bothered to update the website yet. No big deal…my next thought was to go to City Bible's website (so what if i'm mildly obsessed with the boobs on Rocky Butte) to see if they have canceled their service…and then to see if they are still asking for money.

OF COURSE THEY ARE.

A week can not go by where Frank Damazio doesn't ask someone for a handout.  He's like a successful version of the guy standing on the street corner holding the sign.

"Will preach for food".

"Bet you can't hit me with your tithe"

"Faith Harvest Vet…Anything Helps"

"Why lie…I need a bigger church than that bastard Wendall up in Seattle"

 You've all seen the signs. Anyhow, here is CBC's Snow Day announcement:

Dear Congregation:

Due to the snow and poor road conditions there will be no 11 a.m. service on any of the campuses today, Dec. 14. Spanish and other International Ministry services are also canceled . We will be posting a video of the 9:00 a.m. service on our website this evening.  Remember that you can give online as well.

For those with Blessing Tree gift tags, please return those gifts with the tag to the church by Wed. of this week.

Thanks so much for being a great congregation and may God bless you richly!

In Christ,
Pastor Frank Damazio

Remember that you can give online as well…How could they ever forget?

Reformer, This comment you made was so dead on I thought it deserved more attention and so I am posting it again. The letter that Frank sent out about the Lasit's church plant was so full of manipulation…it was hilariously ridiculous. Thank you, Reformer, for pointing out exactly what Frank Damazio was trying to say: 

Pastor Frank Damazio says: If God speaks to you about being a part of this church plant team, we have learned from experience that it is better for everyone involved that you talk to your district pastor or an executive pastor first before talking to them. We are asking you to follow this process so that we can all be confident we are discovering God’s will in this together. We will not start this procedure until February so we can let emotions settle before plans are made. It would be wise not to assume who will go on this team and not to give your assumptions to others.

Are you kidding me? I just love this stuff. His actions make writing in this blog so easy. What he meant to say was:

“We have learned from experience that if we announce that a very popular youth pastor is leaving (a la Wendel Smith, Steve Carpenter, Bob McGregor, Eric Knox, etc.) that a huge majority of are tithing faithful will want to leave with them. Because this hurts our ability to throw big conferences, lease more needless buildings, buy new suits and drive luxury cars, it’s important that you tell us of your intention to leave so that we can talk you out of it by means of guilt and manipulation. We are waiting until February so that we have enough time to prep all of our district and executive pastors on how to do this. Please do not share you knowledge with others about who is leaving because we don’t want it to get out that some very popular families are tagging along, since that would mean others might decide to join. Trust us, we know what God’s plan is for your life. So please continue to sit in our pews, write checks to the order of CBC, and remain silent.”

Well folks…Frank is not off to a good start. In CBC's last bulletin (from Dec 1^st) Frank said "Please join with us during this December series "The Gift" as we preach the grace of God." As I mentioned earlier, I was very excited to hear the "grace of God" (often referred to as "the Gospel") preached from a City Bible Church pulpit (there are 3 you know). Alas, as it turns out, Frank seems to think that the "grace of God" is Love. Now, I'm not trying to knock the "love of God" which led to the "grace of God" which was sending Jesus to earth to pay for our sins…Love eventually gets us to that wonderful story of the Gospel and grace of Jesus…at least it should…of course at CBC it doesn't always work that way.  

I will now sum up for you what Frank Damazio said in his sermon:

"Love. Love. Love. Love. Love."

Followed by an un-cute anecdote about someone loving someone else, which was then followed by Frank telling you how much God loves you…

…right…God loves us so much so that He…come on Frank…that He sent…you know the story PF…that He sent His only…begotten…damn it Frank…you don't know do you?

That's right people he never got there. This was in fact one of the most boring Frank Damazio sermons I have ever heard…unless you feel the need for someone to tell you meaningless stories followed by saying (as inconvincibly as possible) "God loves you", don't waste your time. (I'm really not trying to belittle God's love here…Frank just didn't convince me that he believes what he was saying…it was rather robotic). Anyway, since this blog is all about entertainment, allow me to point you in the direction of something more enjoyable:

…the remainder of this post has been removed by the author due to conviction of the Holy Spirit (with the help of Joebib).

Just when I thought I had seen every comment out there, James goes and says this:

All religion, spirituality, and any “just causes” set aside, you are really doing an impressive job at ruining this man “Frank Damazio’s” life. Good luck with everything.

I don't quite know what to say about that….so I'll move on to address another comment from Frustrated:

Let’s say for the sake of argument, that you are right. Frank Damazio is a cheater. He steals and manipulates. He focuses way too much on tithing and leaders and minimizes the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Allow me to set the record straight. I, Johnpaul Morton, do NOT (let me stress the word NOT)…I do NOT believe that Frank Damazio is a cheater. I do not believe that he Steals. I do NOT believe that he does anything illegal. I happen to believe that Frank is deceived. I believe that Satan has worked his way into the American culture so much that he has many pastors (PF et al) believing that God wants them to be wealthy. Their eyes are blind to the truth and they have been distracted from teaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ. This does NOT mean that they cheat or steal. People CHOOSE to give them money of their own free will.

Pastor Frank Damazio of City Bible Church in Portland, OR is not an evil person…he just happens to be mislead. Please pray for him. 

Have a Happy Thanksgiving.

I would like to take a moment to update everyone on Faith Harvest. I, naturally, have been listening very closely to all of Frank Damazio's Faith Harvest sermons (this year he started prepping his congregation early with the "Surplus" series which he has carried right into "Faith Harvest" which he titled something like Supernatural Supply…). I've heard them all.

I want to revisit this, even though I already posted it once before…this time though, I'd like to issue another challenge with it. This challenge is for all PBC students who read this blog (and for Ben Windle).

Can any of you explain to me how Frank can get away with telling his congregation that Surplus is a good Bible word that means God wants us to have more than enough? Please take into consideration that when I run a Bible Word Search for "Surplus" I can't find any mention of the word in the NIV or the NKJV, and when I find mention of it in the NASB it is only in the following story from Mark 12:41-44:

The Widow's Mite

 41And He sat down opposite the treasury, and began observing how the people were putting money into the treasury; and many rich people were putting in large sums.

 42A poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which amount to a cent.

 43Calling His disciples to Him, He said to them, "Truly I say to you, this poor widow put in more than all the contributors to the treasury;

 44for they all put in out of their surplus, but she, out of her poverty, put in all she owned, all she had to live on."

Please answer these question:

1. Does this scripture, with the word "Surplus" in it, support Frank Damazio's sermon series titled "Surplus"?

2. Does this scripture teach the opposite of what SPFD is teaching in his Surplus series?

3. What should you do about it?

Any good Bible College Student (or youth pastor) should be able to answer those questions…after all we are all searching for the truth….right? Wouldn't it be safer to say that Surplus is a Frank Damazio word that he has attached to the Bible to make it sound more believable?

Please help me understand how this all works. Thanks.

It's the most wonderful time of the year for us at City Business Church…recently Pastor Frank and I had this conversation:

Frank Damazio:  John? I need to see you right away. It's important.
Reformed Pope: [Walking into Frank's office] What's going on?
Frank Damazio: [sighs] We got three big weeks ahead of us. It's Faith Harvest Season, kid!
Reformed Pope: You sandbaggin' son of a bitch!

Reformed Pope: We are gonna have tons and tons of opportunities to meet gorgeous businessmen that get so aroused at the thought of Surplus that they'll throw their inhibitions to the wind.
Frank Damazio: And who will be there to catch them?
Reformed Pope: Grab that net and catch that beautiful butterfly, pal! What do you like better, Christmas or Faith Harvest Season?
[RP raises his hand]
Frank Damazio: Mr. Pope?
Reformed Pope: Yes. The answer would be, um, Faith Harvest Season?

That's right people, it's Faith Harvest Season…grab that net and catch that beautiful butterfly. Frank actually had a warm up sermon last week to get us prepped for Faith Harvest…but before we get to that…did anyone else read this from the Bulletin a couple of weeks ago?

Today's Thought

There was a great need. A starving crowd of humanity. Thousands of children, women, and men, had not eaten for days and now their stomachs were rumbling. There was a great problem. There was nowhere to buy food. No restaurants, no Red Robin, no Winco, and no money. To give each person even a crumb seemed impossible.

Jesus solved the problem, and He solved it with surplus. He took a little and made a lot. With 5 loaves and 2 fish given to Him by a child, Jesus fed the multitude. In fact, not only did He feed them but they were able to eat as much as they liked.  But notice what happened when everyone had eaten. The disciples collected the left overs and it filled 12 baskets. All the doubters were now collecting left overs.  The miracle was not in the feeding but the message was in the left overs. Left overs are a picture of surplus.

Jesus used this situation to not just feed their stomachs but to feed their minds. It was an object lesson that applies to our lives today. Whenever there is a lack, a need, a crisis, an impossible situation, when God intervenes it is not by the skin of His teeth. God doesnt hold His breath and hope that there is almost enough.

Rather, those 12 baskets are the surplus God has for us. Have a 12 basket mindset. When God meets a need it is always in abundance. It may not be food that we need, but for every need in our lives God is able to go beyond a mere covering of our lives that brings our account to neutral. God is able to bring profit, overflow, more than enough, 12 baskets full surplus to our lives.

I'm really really hoping that is a typo…it could be, there are a number of misspellings as well…but I can only take things as they are written, so…

The miracle was NOT in the feeding??? But the message was in the left overs??? Uh…right. I'm sure as Jesus is feeding the thousands and thousands of people they were all saying:

"Ok, sure he can feed us…5,000 or so…but the real test is if he can have any left over"

"I'll just bet that when the last one of us is fed, he runs out of food… some miracle"

"No Surplus, No miracle".

Give me a break. The miracle was in the feeding…the message was in the feeding…the left over "Surplus" is exactly that…left over extras.

Stop trying to force the scriptures to fit what your pastor wants…instead try standing up and saying, "You know Frank, Surplus isn't really a Bible word in the sense that you want it to be". In fact when I run a Bible Word search for "Surplus" in the NIV I come up with…no results…when I search in the New King James Version (CBC's standard reading as I recall) I come up with…"no results"…when I search in the NASB (my favorite version) I come up with…1 result…shall we read it?

The Widow's Mite

 41^(AH)And He sat down opposite ^(AI)the treasury, and began observing how the people were ^(AJ)putting money into the treasury; and many rich people were putting in large sums.

 42A poor widow came and put in two small copper coins, which amount to a cent.

 43Calling His disciples to Him, He said to them, "Truly I say to you, this poor widow put in more than all the contributors to the treasury;

 44for they all put in out of their surplus, but she, out of her poverty, put in all she owned, all she had ^(AK)to live on."

That's right Frank, the one Surplus scripture that I found teaches the exact opposite of what you have been teaching. Please stop misleading your congregation and please start teaching the truth. Frank says "you can't give what you don't have" and I say "Erroneous".

Ian, recently wrote in this comment in regard to Frank Damazio's sermon series about the "Surplus Anointing"

So-far the surplus message has been really great! The whole premise of the surplus series is to get the blessing of God in someones life, so that they can be a blessing to those around them (and NO that does not always mean monetarily). I think it could be taken out of context and called "prosperity teaching". But there hasn't been anything of the likes. I think the world is filled with oppressed and poor people and that we are in many ways oppressed and poor ourselves. However, as God brings us out of our depravity and into freedom He wants to use us as instruments to bring His healing and freedom to others. This is what I've been getting out of the surplus messages so far

Ian, I really (and honestly) appreciate you writing in and telling us how you have enjoyed Frank's sermon series on the "Surplus Anointing".

There are a couple of issues I have with this series. First, Frank frequently says "You can't give what you don't have" and makes it sound like we (Christians) are unable to help others until we receive a special anointing (surplus) from God. And it is only then that we will be able to help others.

Personally, I believe that we all received the "Surplus Anointing" when Christ died on the cross for our sins. This is all the Surplus we will ever need. If we decide to wait until we receive "more than enough" to start helping others we will likely never do anything.  

Here is a better sermon for you:

Christ gave you all you need through Salvation now go help others. Don't sit and think you aren't good enough, or don't have enough, God's grace makes you good enough and gives you more than you need. When you fully understand "grace" you realize that you are instantly a "Super Surplus Person".

Another problem I have with many of PF's sermons is that he rarely tells you HOW to do the things he wants you to do. Mostly, he just hypes you up on WHAT he wants you to do.

Yes Frank, we all want MORE, we all want to HELP others, we all want SURPLUS, but HOW FRANK…HOW do we get it? Interestingly enough, in this series, he actually tries to tell you . Listen to this.

In order to receive this "Surplus Anointing" Frank wants you to:

1.  Stretch 
2.  Reach
3.  Pick up your mantle
4.  Breakthrough
5.  Ask
6.  Dig a New Well
7. Stretch

I am not making any of that up. Seriously. This is Frank's idea of "Biblical Instruction"…generic and random words that sound nice, but don't actually mean anything.

Frank, you want me to "Stretch"…stretch what? And after stretching I am supposed to "Reach"? I guess that makes sense, stretch first that way you won't pull any muscles…thanks.

Then "Pick up my mantle"…what the hell is that? Is it a Surplus mantle? Wait…surplus mantle(?)… now I'm talking crazy. This is getting confusing.

Ok, "Breakthrough"…that sounds nice, I think I'll try that…but wait…what am I breaking through…ok, how about I just "Ask", I can do that. I'll "Ask" for the "Surplus Anointing", but if that doesn't work then what? Uh…lets see… "Dig a New Well"…um Frank….WTF…I live in the city and if I start digging any wells I'm gonna get in trouble…this better be worth it.

In all honesty Ian, can you tell me HOW to get this anointing? It sounds nice, not Biblical, but nice. So how IAN, how do I get this anointing.

By the way, Frank does tell you what an anointing is in his 9/30/07 sermon, I don't have time to get into that, I'm busy looking for a shovel.

Frank Damazio just wrapped up his sermon series titled "Windows: Heavens Treasures". As with all good sermon series these days, each one had a catchy title that began with the letter P…I am amazed at how God is constantly using alliteration to speak to today's pastors, who knew He was so clever… The 5 P's were: Provision, Presence, Providence, Preview, and Promotion.  I blogged about the first few sermons here.

After listening to all 7 sermons I realized that I had heard these same ideas before, in fact I was actually able to find a video of them posted on You-Tube…check this out, it's a real short (30 second) clip and then we can continue. Btw, I just took hours of preaching and boiled it down to one 30 second commercial (I should get paid for this, but I don't. I offer it as a free service).

This is basically what PF's whole series boiled down to…What IF? In each of his sermons he told you what could happen IF you would just "throw open the Windows of Heaven" …

Quick Side Note Here: For all you CBC supporters out there, are any of you willing to come to the defense of your Pastor for the fact that he spent 7 weeks preaching on ½ of a verse? ½ of a verse? Now I don't know a ton about proper hermeneutics, but I'm pretty sure that's a no-no. He  used ½ of Malachi 3:10 which, nicely enough, says exactly what it is that he wants to preach about…throwing open the windows of Heaven…He reads that part of the scripture and then goes on to tell you what HE thinks about it…for 7 weeks. Can you see why I would be concerned with this?

According to Frank, if you "throw open the Windows of Heaven:" then God will essentially bless you. But my question is How? No, not how will he bless me, how do I throw open those windows? After listening to all 7 sermons I honestly couldn't tell you. The one and only point that I can recall Frank making is to give money to the church (naturally). Other than that there wasn't any substance. He did have everyone pray that the windows would open above their life and he also had people act out opening the pretend window right above their heads (I've been learning about Word Faith teachers lately (thanks Craig) and I think PF might be one…actually he's  more of a "Charade Faith" teacher…you know…with the Funnels and Tunnels and now the Windows and stuff…I'll have to think about that some more). My point is, he might as well had people running out and buying Powerball tickets…

But hey, now that a few CBC'ers are starting to come out of the woodwork, does anyone want to tell me what they got out of the series? Despite our sarcasm here, I really am curious to hear if people actually received…no… learned something (anything).

Another tangent:

Do you notice how a lot of churches push "receiving' something as opposed to "learning" something? You can "receive" a warm fuzzy feeling, but that doesn't really mean anything. My question: What did you learn?

Anyway, if anyone else wants to chime in on "What If", I'd love to hear. By the way, when I finally figure out how to "throw open the windows of heaven" I'm getting a pet elephant.

Here is Another great post by Anna Thanks. (btw, the sermon she is referring to is Window's The Provisions of God, Part 2 (Preached on 5/6/07). 

Yesterday I listened to a continuation of the sermon given last Sunday. PF expanded even more on living in blessing…

…PF used an example of how God will orchestrate things for your benefit, and he told the story of a generous man with a painting company who offered to paint the ‘Couve campus for only the cost of the paint ($7000) and waived the labor and equipment fees ($30000+). His response to this generosity? "Thank You Jesus!" Any thanks to the generous man? Hmmm.

Lets not forget that not only did a kind painter offer $30,000 worth of free labor, CBC is also getting the 217 sign replaced for free (a $3,000 value), all because Frank knows how to slide open the windows of heaven, I guess.

I'm not sure why either of those things are listed as "open heavens"…I certainly don't see any examples of that in the Bible (if that book is still relevant…I've been listening to so many CBC and Judah Smith sermons lately I'm beginning to wonder).

I also thought it interesting that in Frank's 1^st "Window's" sermon he told us that we shouldn't worry because "This is not a finance series"…but he has done nothing but talk about finances (aka blessings from God). I keep waiting for him to talk about something other than finances…but I doubt it happens. (I'm going to go off on a bit of a tanget here, I don't recall for certain if Frank used the following scriptures in this sermon, but he has used them in the past and so…)

I'm constantly amazed at how prosperity preachers (such as PF) are willing to quote Matthew 6:21 "where your treasure is there your heart is also" in the middle of a sermon about "Giving money to them" (which is by far the most common topic they preach on) and yet they can't see the correlation to what their own "treasure" is.

If you spend more time Preaching on "giving you money" than anything else…that would mean you would spend more time Preparing to preach on "giving you money" than anything else…which would lead to you spending more time Thinking about people "giving you money" than anything else…yup, I'd say that's where your heart is…right next to your treasure (actually, it's someone else's "treasure", Frank is just trying to get CBC's hands on it).

Then they often throw in Mathew 6:19-20 "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy…" yet that is exactly what THEY ARE TRYING TO DO. It's so incredibly contradictory…I can hardly stand it. Lets try to take a logical look at this:

You, as a member of his church (CBC), are told to "not store up treasures on earth" because when you die "you can't take it with you" (typically followed by the quote "I've never seen a Hearst towing a U-Haul"…lame.).  So the solution, he tells you, is to give away all your treasures…to the church…so they can…store…up…treasure…(long hard pause)…for themselves…?…and in return for this Frank promises that God…will give you…more treasures?

It doesn't add up. If my money is worthless because "you can't take treasures with you" then why does CBC want it…?

I'm going to go throw up now.