This website is a parody of City Bible Church. We are not owned or operated by Frank Damazio or affiliated with City Bible Church. Please do not send us your tithe.
It is not by grace that one enters the kingdom of heaven, but by tithing.

- Damazio 3:16


Archive for the 'Why We Blog' Category

Why we blog

Posted on December 22nd, 2004 by catalyst into the Why We Blog category

As we now have eleven contributors on this site, I would like to explain why we are all here. Blog is short for web-log, and a web-log is basically just an online diary. A place to record your thoughts. It’s just that with this blog, our thoughts are more specific and focused on how we feel about CBC. Each of our contributors has had significant experience with City Business Church. Some of it good; some of it not so good. This blog is merely a forum for us to express how we feel about some of our experiences with this church. The best example of what I’m talking about, is the post right below entitled “The day I robbed God.” I thought the post said a lot about the dangers of preaching the law, as opposed to preaching Christ’s message of grace and compassion. In closing, let me say that the contributors all represent a specific age group. A very sought after age group for advertisers, actually. And an age group which is leaving CBC in droves. Why do you think that is?

DIARY OF A DEAD SOLDIER

Posted on December 20th, 2004 by Reformed Pope into the Why We Blog, When We Quit category

We would like to thank Church Gal for releasing this letter to us. It was her last contact with the Reformed Pope, before he past away. Please send your prayers and support to her and her family at this difficult time.

Catalyst was right. The proud soldier is dead. I appreciate all the support that you all have given me over the past few weeks but I regret to inform each of you that it is over. It is finished. Anonymous was right. CBC was right. And according to one pastor, out of the 395,000 churches in America 390,000 of them believe the way CBC does. How could I possibly think that I had received some sort of special word from God? It was foolish and prideful.

CBC doesn’t preach “give to get”, they simply preach the Word of God. Give and God will give back to you. That principle is undeniable. I clearly caused a lot of people pain and anguish, people that love me so much that my actions brought them to tears. To each of those people I would like to say………………………… “No”.

Do you really think that you can manipulate me into running? No.

Do you really think that you can guilt me into stopping? No.

(sing this next part) No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no God’s not dead, but he’s alive. God’s not dead, but he’s alive. God’s not dead, but he’s alive and I feel him all over me. I feel Him in the street, I feel Him in the air, I feel Him in this blog, yes I feel Him all over me. No, no, no, no, ….(fade song out slowly)

I am sorry that you think this is tearing the church apart. I am sorry that you don’t understand my sarcasm. I am sorry that you refuse to accept that there might be some truth to what we have been saying. But most of all I am sorry that you take yourself so seriously. Lighten up. You might find life to be a bit easier to handle if you can laugh at yourself.

“I saw three checks come mailing in” that’s funny, but maybe you don’t get it. “I saw three ships come sailing in” is a Christmas song. We changed the words. Hilarious. I’m laughing right now as I write this. My heart is light. I would like to sing another song. Everyone join in. BE BOLD! BE STRONG! For the Lord thy God is with thee. BE BOLD! BE STRONG! For the Lord thy God is with thee. I am not afraid, no, no, no. I am not dismayed no, no, no. I’m walking in faith and victory, COME ON, I’m walking in faith and victory for the Lord thy God is with me. (end song)

This is where I get serious. I do not want this site to cause bitterness in anyone’s heart. That truly is not my intention. My intention is not for people to leave CBC. My intention is to cause people to think about what is being said. Question everything, and run it through the Bible. Your faith will grow, and you will be blessed. It does not matter which church you go to. There is no perfect church. Everyone, everywhere take the time to stop and run things through the Bible.
If you are struggling with bitterness, go and reconcile it. If you hear something that doesn’t sound right, don’t be afraid to ask questions. And for goodness sake, everyone, lighten up.

What happens when a church won’t let it’s members question anything? The congregation becomes totally dependant on their pastors for everything. They look to them for complete guidance and they lack their own personal convictions. Imagine what happens when that pastor is not around? This is a dangerous road to walk on.
Pastors of this nation, I challenge you to encourage your congregations to question your teaching (Ombudsmen of America unite). Let them dig into the Word of God to study what you are preaching. How harmful can that be.

On a more personal note, I really struggled with what the right response was going to be.
I was uncertain whether our use of sarcasm was an appropriate way to raise questions in the church or not. After much deliberation I decided that there are many ways to communicate your thoughts, and my generation really responds well to sarcasm. There for I shall continue in my ways.

A blog is nothing more than an online journal. Please understand that this is simply a few men’s opinions. I encourage you all to question everything that we write. Criticism is appreciated as much as support. The important thing to me is that we are all thinking about what we really believe.

Catalyst, hand me my sword.

Forward Together

Posted on December 1st, 2004 by catalyst into the Why We Blog category

The ultimate goal of this blog is to keep an eye on a certain large breasted church in NE Portland. As our former youth pastor used to say, "There is a big eye in the sky watching everything you do." Well, City Business, say hello to the big eye in the sky watching you.

Mission Statement

Posted on December 1st, 2004 by catalyst into the Why We Blog category

To be the Martin Luther of this generation of believers. (of course without all the training and schooling and stuff).